Keeping God at the Center of Your Marriage After Kids
When you first got married, you probably had plenty of time to focus on each other—long conversations, spontaneous date nights, and intentional time spent growing together spiritually. But after having kids, life changes dramatically. Between sleepless nights, endless diaper changes, school drop-offs, and meal prep, it can feel like there’s barely time to breathe, let alone focus on your marriage and faith. So, how do you keep God at the center of your marriage when life with kids is so demanding?
The truth is, it won’t happen by accident. A strong, faith-filled marriage takes intentionality, especially when little ones are vying for your time and attention. But the good news is that God designed marriage as a covenant, and He wants to be at the heart of your relationship. Here are some practical ways to keep Him there.
1. Prioritize Prayer as a Couple
Prayer is one of the most powerful ways to connect with God and with each other. Yet, it’s often one of the first things that gets pushed aside in the busyness of parenting. If you’re not already praying together as a couple, start small. It could be as simple as holding hands and saying a short prayer before bed or praying together before work.
A great way to build consistency is to set a specific time for prayer. Maybe it’s the first thing in the morning, before the kids wake up, or right after putting them to bed. You can also use prayer to support each other in difficult moments, praying for patience, strength, or wisdom in parenting. Inviting God into your daily struggles and victories strengthens not only your faith but also your bond as a couple.
2. Stay Rooted in Scripture Together
Just as your personal faith grows through reading the Bible, so does your marriage. But with kids, finding the time can be tricky. Instead of waiting for the perfect moment, try creative ways to incorporate Scripture into your routine. You can listen to an audio Bible together while making breakfast, follow a couple’s devotional, or text each other a meaningful verse during the day.
Another great idea is to choose a life verse for your marriage — one that reflects your commitment to each other and God. Write it down and place it somewhere visible, like your bathroom mirror or the fridge, as a daily reminder of your relationship's foundation.
3. Keep Christlike Communication at the Forefront
Parenting can bring out the best and worst in us. When exhaustion and stress take over, it’s easy to snap at each other or fall into the habit of only discussing logistics. But healthy communication is vital to a strong, God-centered marriage.
Make it a habit to check in with each other emotionally and spiritually. Ask questions beyond the surface level: How’s your heart? What’s God been teaching you? How can I pray for you? When disagreements arise, approach them with grace and humility. Ephesians 4:2-3 reminds us to “be completely humble and gentle; be patient, bearing with one another in love. Make every effort to keep the unity of the Spirit through the bond of peace.” Speaking with kindness, listening intently, and seeking resolution through prayer can transform how you handle conflict.
4. Make Time for Just the Two of You
It’s easy to become so focused on parenting that your relationship takes a back seat. But one of the best gifts you can give your children is a healthy, thriving marriage. Regular date nights — whether it’s going out or having a cozy night in — help you reconnect and strengthen your bond.
Date nights don’t have to be expensive or elaborate. A simple walk, a visit to a coffee shop, or a board game night after the kids are asleep can work wonders. The key is being intentional about spending quality time together. Prioritizing your marriage shows your children what a God-honoring relationship looks like.
5. Serve in Faith Together
Marriage is a partnership, and one of the most beautiful ways to grow spiritually as a couple is by serving together. Whether it’s volunteering at church, leading a small group, or participating in community outreach, serving side by side deepens your connection to one another and to God.
Involving your kids in service projects is also a great way to model faith in action. When they see you living out your faith as a couple, it leaves a lasting impression on their own spiritual journey.
6. Surround Yourselves with Godly Community
Raising kids and maintaining a strong marriage isn’t meant to be done alone. A support system of like-minded Christian couples can encourage and strengthen you. Whether it’s a small group, a mentor couple, or close friends from church, being around others who prioritize God in their marriage helps keep you accountable.
Seek out relationships with couples who can walk alongside you, pray for you, and offer wisdom when needed. Sometimes, just knowing you’re not alone in the struggles of marriage and parenting can be incredibly reassuring.
7. Remember Your Marriage is a Ministry
It’s easy to think of ministry as something separate from marriage and parenting. But the truth is, your marriage is one of your greatest testimonies. How you love, forgive, and honor each other reflects Christ’s love for your children and those around you.
When challenges arise, remember that your marriage isn’t just about you—it’s a picture of God’s covenant love. Lean on Him in the hard times, celebrate Him in the good times, and trust He is working through every season.
Final Thoughts
Life after kids is full of joys and challenges, and keeping God at the center of your marriage requires effort and intentionality. But with prayer, Scripture, communication, quality time, service, community, and the right perspective, you can build a marriage that survives and thrives.
As Ecclesiastes 4:12 says, “A cord of three strands is not quickly broken.” When you keep God woven into your marriage, He will give you the strength, wisdom, and grace to navigate this season together. Keep leaning on Him, and your marriage will testify to His faithfulness.
Have other God-honoring marriage tips? Drop them in a comment below!
